Travelin’ Woman

What I love about travel is everything I feel I lack when I’m home. When I’m on the road I feel powerful, strong, purpose-filled. Like I could tackle anything.

Travel is like a drug, an intoxicant that gets me high and makes me feel like I can do anything. Like sing karaoke at a really loud, off-pitch variation of a key. It makes me feel confident and self-assured. Capable of so much more.

Whenever I’m home, no matter what stage of my life I’ve returned during, I feel as though the wandering warrior goddess recedes and what gets left behind is a ghost. A dreamlike state of memories from the road I almost can’t believe are my stories. As though the brightness fades and I once again find myself in a smaller box. Wrapped in limitations created by habit and trying to stay small enough to not get noticed.

I go from feeling like the world is my home to hiding behind my home’s walls.

It’s no one’s fault but my own. No one forces me to do this, or coerces me in any way. There’s just some part of myself that shrinks somehow.

That’s also what I love about travel. That enormous feeling of expansiveness. Like there’s a great big world out there and I’m somehow a part of all of it.

This is both the beauty of travel and the lesson of home. Travel provides us with the opportunity to stretch our wings. To expand both our horizons and our minds. It tests our beliefs and asks us to question our worldview. Travel is a beautiful thing.

But home asks us other questions. Feebly extends beautiful gift-wrapped insights we simply have to learn how to hold. How do we hold onto our roots, dig deep, find strength in the stability of “normal” life? How can we continue to expand and open when our feet physically stay in one place?

We learn to go deeper. To explore the world within us that is just as varied and rich and unknowable as the whole Universe out there.

We honor that place inside us where the entire Universe dwells.

It’s a beautiful thought. It’s a tough thought. It’s a challenging invitation. It can feel so much easier, so much less confusing to explore the world around us and find strength out there. But how do we find the strength that sustains us at home?

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